Originally published at: Spicy! | The Associated Worlds

From: Dirigent Suzíët Melantha (IDC/Hanth Cluster Desk)
To: vrin-san-telk (Cluster External Affairs)
Subject: Re: What are these for?

With regard to the above query:

While technically classed as ammonium-breathers, you should be aware that rntrugg metabolism functions by the decomposition of ammonium- and nitrate- based polymeric sugar-analogs into nitrogen. As such, virtually all rntrugg foodstuffs are de facto explosives in an oxygen atmosphere. Thus, in order to set up this conference, the requested import, transport, etc. waivers and exemptions are required by our caterers.

You should also be advised that rntrugg without snacks are notoriously irritable, and thus undesirable negotiation partners.

Given under my hand and seal this day, 6088 Tilenmot 11,

Suzíët Melantha,
Imperial Diplomatic Corps

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“Guns or butter?”


It is strongly suggested that gardenworld planetside facilities for mtrugg, particularly any specialized hostelries, supply depots, or cuisineries, be located in settings that are scenic, tranquil, ecologically and geologically stable, accessible to xenomedical and xenosocial services, amenably staffed with an exofriendly memetic milieu, free of extranet signal interference, tastefully aesthant-embellished, and above all, physically isolatable.

Far from being an inhospitable gesture, such design considerations are intended to be, foremostly, in the clientele’s interest: the last thing an itinerant vacation troupe (“Beauty Through Poison Gases: Appreciating Caustic Oxygenated Biomes”) or businesssoph conference needs is some complication from a neighboring building causing safety issues, or worse, accidental detonations.

That the design constraints also discourage pro-entropic sophs from seeing mtrugg facilities as targets of opportunity is a happy convergence of intentions.